My Self

I thought that being strong
Meant never losing my self-control
But sometimes letting go of myself
My feelings, my emotions
Is the exact thing God needs me to do
So He can make something even more beautiful
Out of the broken pieces.

I thought that being silent
Holding everything inside my heart
Not letting it take over myself
Was what was best for me
But apparently not
Because as soon as I let it loose
It came like a flood.

I thought that being an actor
Was what could hide everything the best
Pretending that I was myself
That everything was okay
But inside, I was breaking
I was dying
And the only One who could see that
Was God.

And then...
Little by little
Piece by piece
He took my hurting heart in His hands
And gently held it, and comforted it
And told me to just let Him have it
I thought He already did
But my self had tried to stay joyful
Stay happy, stay content
On its own.
But my self had failed.

Oh but He still looked on me with love
And tears streamed down my face
As my heart cried out with my voice
His loving arms wrapped around me
His voice soothed my spirit
His hand pulled my self gently back towards Him.

My self was finally home.
My self was where it should have been all along.


  1. Hey, you might be interested in some of my recent posts. :) They are somewhat along the lines of this post. I hope they bless you. :)


  2. This is SO beautiful, Raquel! Thank you so much for posting it!! I really needed it today!