3.08.2014

7 Things Singles Should Remember



1. It’s okay to admit that you’re struggling with being content
Many people think that if you’re trusting God to bring a spouse to you, waiting patiently, trying to stay joyful, etc., then you have nothing to complain about.  But trusting God is never all rainbows and roses.  It’s painful.  It’s hard.  Don’t be afraid to admit this.  And seek out encouragement from other single friends.


2. You aren’t alone in your singleness
There are tons of other singles around you.  Interact with each other.  Encourage each other.  Have fun together.  Plan ‘Singles Day’ outings and go to the beach, go rock-climbing, have a Bible study. 


3. Others have been where you are
We all have friends who are happily married.  Some are quite a few years older than ourselves.  But they’ve ALL experienced the ‘single and waiting’ stage.  Ask them for advice and encouragement. 


4. Think of positive aspects to being single
One of them being, you have SO much time to do things that are important to you.  Things that your future partner, perhaps, may not enjoy as much as you do.  You can advance your skills in certain areas, pursue hobbies, go on spontaneous trips, etc.  These are all things that, if you were in a relationship, would come second to spending time with your significant other.  But while single, you aren’t ‘tied down’ (for lack of a better phrase) and can enjoy life as a single person, rather than as one in a committed relationship.


5. Stay busy
I’ve known a lot of single people who don’t stay busy and when you don’t stay busy, your mind wanders, and when your mind wanders, it usually wanders to big issues in your life - either dreams, wishes, or plans.  And if you’re single and wanting to mingle, your thoughts will most likely focus on your loneliness.  This is NOT good for you - physically or emotionally.  So STAY BUSY.  Get a job, hang out with friends, start a blog.  Keep your schedule full and busy.  And one super positive aspect to staying busy too, is that you learn to love your life because it’s full of things you love and enjoy doing (this goes hand in hand with point number 4).


6. Be happy for couples
Yes, so it can be really super hard sometimes to be genuinely happy for some friends who are together and lovey-dovey and in that oh-we’re-so-in-love stage that, to you, can be kind of disgusting.  But when we are joyful for someone else’s happiness, it brings US joy too.  And anyway, wouldn’t you want someone to be happy for YOU instead of harboring feelings of jealousy towards what God has blessed you with?


7. Work on your relationship with God
While you’re single, you have the opportunity to further your education, your job, but most importantly, your relationship with God.  The most important relationship you’ll ever have. Even more important than marriage.  And if you never do get married, if a spouse isn’t in God’s plans for your life, the time invested in your love story with Jesus will never get old, it will never end, it will never disappoint.  A boyfriend/girlfriend isn’t going to make your life perfect.  A spouse isn’t going to fulfill every single desire you have.  But God can and does.  And if you have Him, you have everything you need.


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These aren't the only things you should remember while you are single.  I'm sure there are many more that can be added to this little list, but these are the top few that I, personally, have come to learn during my single years and I hope they encourage and motivate you.  Leave a comment and let me know some other ones that you would suggest singles remember!


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‘Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.’
- Philippians 4:11


5 comments:

  1. These are great reminders, Raquel. I'll have save and book-marked this one whenever I don't feel content. :) Thank-you for posting this!

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  2. these are wonderful tips, Raquel.

    My oldest brother married his beautiful girl three months ago, and my other older brother has been in a relationship with a wonderful girl for over a year now, and even though I'm only seventeen it can be really hard sometimes, when it seems like everyone around me is in a relationship, engaged, married or even having babies. And it feels like I'll never find "the perfect one." It's hard to be content and live for the "right now."

    I will definitely refer back to this post often!! Thank you so much! <3

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  3. Oh wow! Thank you so much for your #1--"It's okay to say you're struggling with being content." Most of the time these "single" posts are so filled with "Be content, be content, BE CONTENT!!!!!" (which, of course, we do need to be), and it was so refreshing to see a post on this begin this way. Thank you.

    walking in the air.

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  4. Relationships -especially friendships and "special" ones - has been something I have thinking upon a great deal of late. And something I find I must always keep reminding myself is that no relationship, however deep will ever replace my relationship with God and He should be the basis for all of them. So anyway, one of my thoughts of late. :) Thank you so much for the post!

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  5. "It's okay to say you're struggling with being content."

    Wow -- this really touched me. Trusting God is certainly not always rainbows and roses, but He loves us SO much, and He wants us to trust in Him -- He has great things in store for us! Thanks for such a powerful reminder.

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