I've never been opposed to online dating. I know quite a few couples who've met through Christian Mingle, eHarmony, even Facebook, Instagram or blogs. And a large percentage of them have gotten married.
I believe God can use ANY means to bring two individuals together. And in this day and age, you can sure as heck meet, be attracted to, become interested in and start dating people through social medias. You never know what you'll find. But you shouldn't count on it 100% working all the time, for every single person, including yourself.
It went pretty well...at first. It wasn't as if I was extremely lonely or felt "doomed" to singleness. Some days I honestly couldn't imagine myself being okay with committing to a relationship again.
I met quite a few guys via several different dating apps. I was attracted to some, I developed an interest in some, I could even go so far as to say that I developed a crush on some of these guys that I met online. I went on a few first dates too, that all went well - a couple of whom wanted to see me for a second or third date. (Sorry, no First Date Horror Stories for you.)
But the truth is, after just a few days of swiping right and being matched, I felt that online dating had calloused me. I didn't have as much of a desire as I once did to 'put myself out there' and 'see who I'll meet'. They could tell me how attracted they were to my face and body. Some were even decent enough to say they were attracted to my heart and personality. They told me how much they enjoyed our conversations, but I was always wondering how long it would last. How long before they got bored of me? How long before they made it clear that they didn't have serious intentions?
And that's when I realized something...
I had allowed online dating to unintentionally make me label guys 'future disappointments'.
Or believe that I will disappoint them.
So a part of my brain kept saying, "You're just never gonna be good enough."
And that's a lie.
Because I know my self-worth. I know I am valuable. I want to be respected. I want to be cared for.
Honestly, I think there are more cons than pros when it comes to meeting someone through the internet. Getting cat-fished, to name one. Or worse yet, you become callous to every person who hits you up with a "Hey, what's up?" after you were matched with them.
Sure, the initial "It's a match!" boosts your confidence...for about five seconds. But the truth is, all the messages and faces will just mesh into a blur and you'll only be swiping right out of pure boredom.
Or you'll have a good, steady messaging-back-and-forth going with one guy, but the next day, won't hear from him. Next week his account will be deleted. And next week, you're left feeling depressed and wondering, "What did I do wrong?"
Others, like myself, would much rather do without being bored and swiping right.
If online dating isn't the thing for you either, then quit it. It's as simple as click 'Delete My Account' and then removing the app from your phone.
And that is why I tried Tinder for five days and then was like "Screw this. I deserve better."