1.27.2017

Investing Or Removing

There's a difference between someone not wanting to invest in your life, and you removing them from your life.

This new year, I've slowly been disconnecting people from my social medias who I don't talk to and frankly, don't even know.  Weird how they even got onto my friends lists!  It's just dawned on me lately how many people who I don't invest in shouldn't be able to see into my personal life details.
Twitter and Instagram are one thing.  Both of my accounts on those apps are public.  But Facebook and Snapchat... do I want everyone to be seeing what I'm doing, where I am, who I'm with?  It's kind of creepy, if you ask me.  Plus, if I'm not giving them the time of day (not intentionally, of course), then why are they even having access to my life?

Relationships are two way streets - which leads me to another point I have.  If someone isn't willing to invest in you as you are investing in them, it's time to say goodbye.  Plain and simple.  They're basically telling you that you're not worth their time or love.

I recently got a text from someone who I considered very dear to me, saying that "we shouldn't talk anymore" and that it wasn't "anything personal".  No rhyme or reason.  It blindsided me for sure, but I've gotten to a point in my life where I just accept the actions of others without question.  Why?  Because I will never understand the majority of the decisions people make.  We all live different lives, have different opinions, choose different paths, and if I'm not chosen to be in someone's life, cool.  Their loss.

So how did I handle that "friend" texting me that?  I went and removed them from my social medias.  Unfriended, unfollowed, deleted.  Not because I don't love them anymore and don't want to be in their life, but because they chose for me not to be.

I often wonder if I've just become a calloused and hard-hearted b****.  I've been hurt and disappointed so many times.  I sometimes ask myself, "When will it all end?"  I guess I know the answer to that question but regardless, it still gets asked.

I think that, above all, I've simply learned to accept how others behave.  I have also learned to not let it affect me because that is something I do have control over.  To stay healthy, to be safe, one needs to protect oneself from any one or any thing that chooses to be harmful - whether physically or emotionally.  And when someone chooses to not be a personal investor in my life, as I would gladly be in theirs, then they don't earn the right to know me.  I'm not responsible for others actions or how they choose to view me.  I live my life according to my convictions, my thoughts, my opinions, my views.  If someone sees that and doesn't like it, they don't have to be a part of my life.

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